Category Archives: Relationship Compatibility

How To Say It: How to Reject an Unexpected Date Invitation

This line fell out of my mouth when a man asked me out on a date five minutes after we met. It felt like the perfect thing to say without lying, and I liked the way he reacted to it. The Situation: As you wait in line at the post office, you have a 5-minute […]

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How To Say It: Decline A Long-time Friend Who Now Wants More

The Issue: Sexual Chemistry as the Dealbreaker. You have been close friends for a long time and love each other. But now he wants it all, sex and a serious relationship with you. Having him as your partner would be perfect. You can see yourself living your life with him … except that you have […]

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How To Say It: A New Relationship – Not On Same Page? How to Break It Off

The Issue: You like this person. You want more but sense the feeling is not mutual. You spend more time feeling anxious rather than happy about the relationship. Maintain your integrity. It’s time to communicate your feelings, knowing this conversation could likely end the relationship. Don’t lose yourself in hard work trying to get your […]

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How To Say It: Dating Someone New – The Break It Off Talk

The Issue: You have been out a few times and you like this person. Unfortunately, the romantic spark isn’t there for you. But, you like the idea of becoming friends. The Opener: “I am glad to be spending time with you. I like the easy connection we have. And,” Get In It (3 options): “I […]

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“How To Say It” Series

The “We Need to Talk” division of A Sound Match helps you manage your dates, significant others and all kinds of personal relationships with practical tips and advice. The “How To Say It” Series suggests how to calmly start a difficult conversation and walk away feeling relieved. Intimidated by an upcoming talk? Make your approach, […]

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Build a fort. Start talking.

Without exception, every breakup story I hear has to do with a breakdown in communication. A while back I wrote a post urging couples to supervise their relationships. Have scheduled talks that I call “The Huong Phat.” While this concept freaks out most every man I know, my response is “so what?” Would you rather […]

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Ambiguity is a silent relationship-killer

Ask me anything, if you do not understand me. I’ll try my best to be clear and honest with you. Why is it so hard for you to return the favor so that I can get clarity about what’s going on between us? Do not give me hints. Do not force me to decode the […]

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Find Meaningful Relationships in Unexpected Places – Take A Sound Match To Go

I recently heard a conference panelist complain that he didn’t know half of the “friends” in his network.  He wanted the ability to discover the one or two people that would add meaning to his life.  I practically jumped out of my seat and screamed “I can help you do that!”  But I kept my […]

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Music Personality Baby-Naming

Years ago, I needed a relevant way to identify the four types of music listeners that I believe exist in the world. Back then, I called them Devotees, Enthusiasts, Ambivalents and Apathetics. I suspected the latter two groups might not appreciate the name-calling, so I needed neutral names, not knowing how these labels would be […]

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